REDUCTIO AD ABSURDUM

THIS SITE (‘ZARATHUSTRA SHALL SPEAK’, HEREAFTER REFERRED TO AS ‘THE SITE’) AND ALL CONTENT CONTAINED THEREIN IS PERSONAL IN NATURE, AND MAY ONLY BE TREATED FOR PURPOSES LEGAL AND OTHERWISE AS PERSONAL OPINION, EVEN IF OTHERWISE PREFACED. IT MAY NOT BE CONSTRUED UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WHATSOEVER AS BEING ENDORSED, SUPPORTED OR AGREED WITH, OR AS BEING THE OPINION OR BELIEF OF MY EMPLOYER (PAST, PRESENT OR FUTURE), THOR, MARS, SUZUMIYA HARUHI, CROM, THE FLYING SPAGHETTI MONSTER, OR ANY CORPORATION, BUSINESS, DEITY, PERSON OR ENTITY THAT I AM ENGAGED IN ANY FORM WHATSOEVER OF RELATIONSHIP WITH.

BY VIEWING THE SITE, YOU AGREE THAT ANY ISSUE OR COMPLAINT THAT MIGHT REQUIRE LEGAL INTERVENTION SHALL INSTEAD BE ROUTED TO ARBITRATION BY A GRAND COUNCIL (HEREAFTER REFERRED TO AS ‘THE COUNCIL’) WHOSE NUMBER SHALL BE TWELVE. THE MEMBERSHIP OF THE COUNCIL SHALL BE ARBITRARILY ELECTED. SIX MEMBERS SHALL BE ELECTED BY YOURSELF OR YOUR LEGALLY AUTHORIZED REPRESENTATIVE OR REPRESENTATIVES; THE REMAINING SIX SHALL BE ELECTED BY THE OWNER OF THE SITE.

IF A CASE ARISES IN WHICH ARBITRATION BY THE COUNCIL CANNOT REACH A CONCLUSION SATISFACTORY TO BOTH PARTIES, YOU AGREE THAT YOU (HEREAFTER REFERRED TO AS ‘FREEBORN SCUM’) SHALL SUBMIT YOUR CLAIM TO A TRIAL OF GRIEVANCE. THE LOCATION OF A CIRCLE OF EQUALS SHALL BE DEFINED IN INTERNATIONAL WATERS BY THE COUNCIL, BATCHALL SHALL BE EXECUTED BETWEEN THE OWNER OF THE SITE AND FREEBORN SCUM, AND THE ISSUE AT HAND SHALL BE RESOLVED BY COMBAT.